I woke up a few days ago in a puddle. The generators, which I wrote spin tirelessly for our livelihood, failed at my compound. It was a pretty tragic series of days. In case you don’t know exactly what a generator failure means…our many (and quite needed!) A/C units have these little umbilical chords attaching to our mother and life source (electricity), by which they derive their life and being. Our own little conspiracy theorists (well, me, actually) theorized that the Pentagon wanted to make sure we had a real “desert experience” while appearing to be benevolent at the same time…so what’s actually happening is that when generators fail they keep sending us these clunky things they call “generators” which are actually just big boxes of satellite phones and treated-leather pistol holsters for all the officers wanting to look cool like “all the other officers who have them.” Take that, Michael Moore! I can conspiracy theorize, too. Praise be to God, from whom all blessings of conditioned air does flow, I no longer have to grow gills in order to sleep throughout the night. That, and it would have been only a matter of time before my batteries would have been exhausted, and flashlights are only tolerable for so long. I guess, though, these kinds of inconveniences connect me a little more viscerally to the many (so very very many) war fighters having to battle the heat in direct sunlight day after day.
Some good news came in today. Special requirements came down my way concerning a detainee I’ve been questioning. Well, I was just notified that the results of my past three interrogations received special recognition from “higher up”. Today I prepared a briefing to be delivered to Major General Miller and General King (Ret.), who was previously the temporary Army Chief of Staff (or some other really huge office that is so important I don’t really remember what it is…). Well, I prepared furiously, after being told I’d be briefing the generals in less than 20 minutes. Made outlines and some visual aids to consolidate the information mash. I rehearsed my briefing several times in front of other commanders and my section supervisor…then waited. Finally the two bigwigs arrived, with surprisingly minimal entourage. When I met General Sanchez, he had a troupe of like 8 different Majors and above, and he was flown in with three big ‘ol helicopters (I’m not much for names and such). Well, after listening to the first briefing and General King telling us about the times he spoke with Ted Koppel on Nightline (there was a lot of after the fact eye rolling about that one!), I got nicely glazed over. Oh well, that’s what the world is like. I brief for their purposes, not mine. It was a bit of a let down, though…don’t tell anyone, but my briefing was better. Shhhh. But, c’est la vies, no?
Anyhow, back to the interrogation reqs and such. My cigarettes and smiles with the ruthless man I spoke of briefly, I guess, did something profitable for the commanders in the field. That was a very big boost of confidence, being that the best thing I did was simply respect him. Talk to him as if I had no idea of his past crimes…which, in as much as I can disclose, were simply unbelievable…and quite a bit of valuable information was gleaned. Listening goes so much farther than speaking, generally. People usually broadcast their lies and anxieties by what they say or fail to say. If one is patient enough to listen, criminal guilt or shame in general will show itself, unless a person is a seriously trained actor. I imagine this is simply the natural corollary to “what is done in the dark, will be seen in the light”. That, and secrecy is simply boring. Nobody truly loves secrecy, carrying ones burdens and joys alone. Everyone wants a confessor and a confidant. Listening to the cues of a person who does not want to come right out and say something, but doesn’t want to continue carrying a burden of guilt or shame, is not only what interrogation is all about…it’s what being a decent human being is about. I do not coerce. I cannot say that emphatically enough. Not emotionally, not psychologically, and certainly not physically. Everyone, however, has some level of desire to be understood, and to be justified in their actions or beliefs. Knowing the other person, understanding them in their own convictions, and listening to them tell their own stories is something I value in my line of present work (and, apparently, so do by default the “higher ups”). I think this is God’s answer to prayer in trying to make sense of this madness I’m a part of here. I’ll be talking with him quite a bit more, as additional info requests came down to me “from above” after the success I had with him on their first batch of requests. I know this information will save many American lives, so back at it, hard as always. Even knowing that, though, doesn’t make this any easier.
Because, point blank, how could I not identify with or attempt to understand these people, their beliefs and convictions. Let me explain: let there be no mistake, this is not glamorous work. It is not to be envied. I go through so very many moments of sheer rage when talking to some of these detainees. Not because I’m enraged with them. Rather, I’m enraged that I’m talking with them at all. There is certainly a role for people like me here, and for the Marine’s and Rangers and Infantrymen risking there lives in harms way each and every day. But, I can’t tell you how many times I talk to people, both detainees and everyday Iraqi citizens, and come away believing that the vast majority of Iraqis would still be simple farmers and tradesmen if we were not in their backyard, or if the contour of this presence had a different face.
Foreigners (extremists from Syria, Saudi Arabia, Jordan, Yemen) use the lack of education, lack of jobs, and extreme poverty (due to the 13 years of economic sanctions) to enlist broken-spirited Muslims into terrorist or other anti-coalition groups and activities. When faced with the options of remaining under Saddam, listening to what simply has to appear to them like another big-money rich white aristocrat from the West (interested in them for their business prospects and political capital), or another Muslim who speaks their language and has their color of skin…what kind of choices do these people have? 500 years of previous colonialism. 40-some years under Saddam. 13 years of barely being able to buy penicillin or pencils, because they were banned under the embargo (as “weapons materials”). A war with another man named Bush who told the Shia and the Kurds to rise up in revolt against Saddam and we’d support them…only to meet a massacre when we did not support this incredibly short lived uprising.
And amazingly, the vast majority desperately wanted the Americans to come…basically, to finish what they started 13 years ago. But, the change, both which we promised and they so desperately desired, has not come. And how could it? We are an Army equipped to fight an enemy, but that means knowing who that enemy is. The once-“soldiers” (of the old Iraqi Army) became “terrorists” in the war on terror, became insurgents in the reconstruction, and are now in some cases becoming “allies” in nation building. How could they be expected to believe us? Previously, when people opposed Saddam, their entire families would be summarily executed. When Western nations came to these lands in history past, it was for one reason: create colonies of a far-off empire. There is a line in “The Patriot” when General Cornwallis tells his commander to pipe down his own terror tactics, because “after this war, we will re-establish commerce with these people, we cannot make enemies with them” or something to that effect. These people have known colonialists and totalitarians. And now, a Texan oil tycoon from the land of opportunity (with the most destructive army in the history of warfare at his command) tells them they are free. “Let my daughter have food,” they say. “Are we free because he tells us so? I’ll have to see this in my life, and when there are not tanks in my streets.” Are we also telling a people they are free in order to “re-establish commerce”?
There is such a toll as well on the hearts of Americans. Soldiers wanting something to believe in, a cause bigger than themselves to make sense of it all, will often grow cold toward the Iraqis. “Why don’t they understand, show us some appreciation? I’m risking my life for them.” It’s just not that simple. In so many ways, this just has to be a thankless job; maybe something hard for a 19 year old Marine to understand. The Iraqis don’t have the luxury to “trust” our good intentions, they’ve been taken advantage of for all of modern history. There simply is not the precedent to warrant that kind of faith, let alone faith in a foreign power. Trust extends to the edges of the tribe, everyone else was someone who might turn you in to the Fedayeen Saddam, a Gestapo like organization made for civic domination. And then when your sister, cousin, brother is killed in a well-intending precision guided bomb that goes off course, destroying a housing complex, you can’t tell them, “We mean well.” That’s a sister or father who will never come home again. So many turn to religion, then, to make sense of the chaos. Terrorism is bread that way. People need something to believe in, something to put their anger and disappointment into. For disenchanted Americans it is the thankless Iraqis or the scheming Bush Administration. For Iraqis, it is the invading “infidel” and hence Allah who will avenge the injustice; or for the less religious, they turn simply to an “army” to make them feel not forgotten, and something to have which is worth living and dying for (namely, their dignity). This is why it is so imperative that we seek other means of fighting terrorism than by force. We cut down one generation of terrorists while nursing the next on their legacy of their ancestors’ glorified resistance to injustice and exploitation.
This is not said to state that the Americans are bad, or that the Iraqis picking up arms fighting the force which is rebuilding their country ought not to be held accountable. This is said as a testament to the immeasurable consequences of war upon the human spirit, on both sides of conflict. This is not a time for “resolve” so much as it is for “repentance.” Abandon the Iraqis, certainly not. Accept and acknowledge the mistakes made, absolutely. But, it’s election season. Not a great time for humility and confession. All I can say is pray.
On a slightly lighter note, I’ve reconnected with my Iraqi friend Lazim, who works with the coalition, after weeks of differing lunch schedules and a dining facility change of location. We’ve been talking about the Koran and the Bible, Jesus and the Virgin Mary, Shias, Sunnis, Catholics, Protestants, and…computers. He’s been wanting to get a laptop for a while and has enough money to spend about $700 (contracted local nationals get paid pretty good wages). Well, I’ve found a fully equipped, DVD and all, laptop online that we’re looking to order for him. Only, I’d like to see about getting for him…without him paying for it. I’m prepared to front a good amount, if not all, but if anyone would like to be a part of this computer purchase, let me know. I try to talk to locals as much as I possibly can, if only “good morning” in Arabic, or thanking them for their hard work, which is often incredibly difficult manual labor. I’m glad I can do this, being that not many here know Arabic, but I’d love to be able to do a bit more than just offer courtesy of tongue. We’ll see what can happen, I guess. Pray, pay, whatever you are lead to do, and by no means do I require a response even from any of you. Pray that the right token of kindness would present itself, if anything beyond dialogue or courtesies is possible, or even desirable. Well, I guess that’s about it for now. Thank you all, so very much for your prayers. It’s pretty late at night now, so I must get me to a nunnery to say my own! God bless and peace be with you all. Oh, also, I recently wrote an article that’s being published presently in a newspaper called “Stars and Stripes” (an actually pretty fair and independent newspaper, printed especially for troops). My article is a response to an editorial on gay marriage and a proposed Constitutional Amendment. I’ve put the article below, since “Stars and Stripes” is kind of hard to navigate online, in case anyone wants to read it. It was great to write something about a topic other than war…I hope all this opining, though, doesn’t offend too many of you. As I’m sure most of you know, however, I always like a good controversy and debate. At least as it relates to the ongoing conflict here, though, I guess I somewhat see it as my duty to write what I see, and say what I think, in as honest a way as possible. Thanks for being open to listen.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home