And the Survey Says...

Yesterday I received a "radio ratings" package from Arbitron Ratings. It consists of a personal 7-day radio ratings "diary", an instruction guide and a crisp one dollar bill.

This is what they want me to record in my "diary":
Time: "Write the time you start listening ("listening" is any time you can hear a radio - whether you choose the station or not) and the time you stop."
Station: "Write the call letters, dial setting or station name. Mark AM or FM."
Place: "Mark where you listen: at home. in a car, at work, other."

Then there's a 27-question survey. Basically, I'm telling the researchers that I am a 26 year old female Republican and I like beer.

My favorite part is the compensation. Remember that crisp dollar bill I mentioned? Yup - that's what they sent me. There's absolutely no guarantee that I'll participate in the survey, but I get the dollar anyway. Sa-WEET!

I want to work for Arbitron. I want to be the gental hand that slips a crisp dollar bill into millions of mailboxes every year. I want to tweak the results of the surveys according to my own wants and needs. I want to control the nation's marketing efforts. I want to become Dogbert.